1) Who Am I? - A Journey of Self-Discovery
“Who am I?” This is the most frequently heard question when one starts to be curious on the path of spirituality. This fundamental question has been asked by every saint, marking the beginning of their journey of self-discovery. Though it may sound very simple, it is not asked by just anyone, but by someone who feels that they are lacking something in this materialistic world and wants to seek a deeper meaning in their life. So, really, “Who am I?”
"I" is not merely a name given at birth, a profession we identify with, or the roles we play each day—such as parent, friend, employee, or citizen. These are just the layers we wear to identify ourselves at any point in our lives. These layers keep changing at each stage of life. The true "I" is an unchanging entity that was created by an infinitely small fragment of the vast space of the universe. So essentially, "I" am a part of the vast "Nothing" of the universe.
The Chivality practice focuses on only one ultimate goal: to realize our authentic self, thus attaining Mukti. To reach this understanding, we must let go of all negative qualities that cloud our mind. Qualities like anger, fear, jealousy, pride, etc. These qualities are not who we really are and serve neither us nor others.
The path to self-discovery requires us to become like a speck of sand in the vast ocean. A speck is silent and makes no disturbance. This is why the Silentation practice is so powerful. Through silence, we learn to dissolve the noise of our restless minds and connect with something deeper. To become this peaceful speck, we must first become Nirguna—free from all negative qualities that weigh us down.
These roles we play in the materialistic world are necessary for functioning in society, but only a Gnani can help us understand that we are none of these roles. These roles are just for us to pass the time in this life, and they are nothing to be taken seriously. One who truly understands this remains undisturbed within and therefore does not react easily.
What makes us human is our mind, but this same mind often becomes our greatest obstacle in knowing our true selves. We must learn to empty our mind through silence, which has the power to dissolve all negativity. Our mind can be compared to an onion. Like the many layers of an onion, the mind also has many layers. Attachments, identities, and old impressions each form a separate layer. Through dedicated practice, we peel away these layers one by one until nothing remains. This "Nothing" is our true self, free from all limitations and suffering.
When we begin to shed our negativity and become more positive, it's a clear sign that we're making genuine progress toward Mukti. One of the biggest obstacles on this path is how we handle our daily responsibilities. Responsibilities themselves aren't the problem—they're a natural part of life. The real issue is worrying about what we haven't accomplished or what we might not complete. This worry creates a heavy burden on the mind, leaving deep impressions that eventually become karmaphala.
The key is to fulfill our responsibilities without anxiety about what remains unfinished. We must do what we can with sincerity and dedication and let go of the outcome. This doesn't mean being careless or lazy. It means acting from a place of inner peace rather than worry.
Today, we may identify strongly with the various roles we play and take pride or pain from them. But the deeper truth is that we are none of these roles. When we truly understand this, we can perform any role without mental suffering. The pain, stress, and struggle we feel are not truly ours, for at our core, we are beyond them all. You're not the “thing” that receives any pain, since you are “NOTHING.”
Therefore, in essence, the journey to discovering our true selves is not about escaping life but about engaging with it more consciously. When we perform our responsibilities without attachment and free ourselves from the mental weight of worry, we stop creating new impressions. Through silence, self-inquiry, and letting go of negativity, we gradually return to our original state—pure, peaceful, and free.
True liberation, or Mukti, is not something far away. It is the natural result of realizing that we are not the changing roles we play, but the unchanging awareness behind them. In that realization, all suffering ends, and what remains is stillness, clarity, and an unshakable inner bliss.
2. Breaking Free from the Cycle of Suffering
Have you ever wondered why suffering seems to follow us through life, even when we try our best to avoid it? The answer lies in understanding karmaphala, the fruits of our actions that have been imprinted in our subconscious mind.
So, what is karmaphala? Whenever we do any action (karma), the mind often worries constantly about the results of that action. It wishes for success or fears the failure of that action. The mind is also adept at creating sorrow for the actions that were done in the past. Thus, the thoughts that constantly weigh the mind down create what is called karmaphala.
This karmaphala is of three types, depending on when it was created:
Sanchita: This karmaphala was generated in previous births and becomes the main reason for the current birth.
Prarabdha: Karmaphala created during this current birth due to excessive thoughts and worries.
Aagami: Residual karmaphala that is left after suffering in this birth. It is carried over to the next birth. It is a mixture of both sanchita and prarabdha.
The goal of life is to accept our accumulated karmaphala (sanchita) with patience and allow it to be completely exhausted. In this life, we must remain mentally detached from the actions we perform so that new karmaphala (prarabdha) is not created.
The Chivality system focuses on reducing karmaphala through silence. As karmaphala dissolves, mental disturbances fade, and deep, lasting peace arises. Karmaphala is the root cause of both joy and sorrow. When a person becomes free from karmaphala, they transcend all emotional extremes and remain undisturbed, whether facing praise or blame, gain or loss.
We are born in this world because of karmaphala. The purpose of this birth is to attain Mukti (liberation) and become completely free from it.
How is karmaphala created? It mainly arises when we do things we don't like or act under compulsion. Regretting incomplete tasks and constantly worrying about them can also generate karmaphala.
The solution is strikingly simple: If you wish to do something, do it with full presence. If you cannot do it, let it go without worry. Likewise, if you don't want to do something, simply don't do it. This isn't about being irresponsible; it's about acting from a place of clarity rather than compulsion.
As karmaphala reduces, our perception begins to shift positively. We start seeing situations differently, responding with more wisdom and less reactivity. This positive shift in perception is a reliable sign that our karmaphala is decreasing.
When karmaphala is completely destroyed, even the memory of painful incidents naturally fades away. At the time of death, if all karmaphala has been erased, Mukti can be attained. This is why the Chivality system focuses so much on clearing these karmaphala while we're still alive.
Life will always present difficulties. Problems arise when work isn't done correctly or when circumstances don't align with our expectations. Difficulties are inevitable, but suffering is optional. While difficulties come from outside circumstances, suffering comes from within—from how we choose to respond.
The key is not to think obsessively about difficulties when they arise. If we don't feed them with excessive mental attention, we won't create additional karmaphala. It's like a fire; without fuel, it naturally dies out.
During times of hardship, avoid blaming external causes or people. This restraint helps reduce existing karmaphala rather than adding to it. Instead of getting lost in endless analysis of why something happened, practice tolerance. Let the difficulty pass through you like clouds passing through the sky. Acknowledge it, but let it not settle in your mind.
When Chivam energy is available to you, suffering gradually disappears. As the saying goes, “Shiva Shiva endare suffering illa”; when we connect with Chivam, suffering simply cannot exist in that space.
3) The question 'Who am I?' is not really meant to get an answer; the question 'Who am I?' is meant to dissolve the questioner.
Freedom Within: The Path Beyond Reaction and Thought
A true Gnani never interferes with another person's freedom. This principle reveals one of the most important truths on the spiritual path: everyone is on their own journey, with the inherent right to make their own choices, even when those choices affect us directly.
This understanding isn't always easy to accept. Our natural impulse is often to correct others, control outcomes, or shape circumstances to our preferences. Yet real growth happens when we step back and allow life to unfold without judgment or force. When we begin to experience freedom within ourselves, we truly respect others' freedom.
The Foundation of Inner Freedom
Consider this simple example: A spiritual seeker was travelling from village to village.One afternoon, after walking for many hours under the sun, he felt very hungry.
He approached a small house where a man was sitting in the shade and said gently, “Could you please give me some food? I haven’t eaten since morning.”
The man looked at him briefly, then replied, “Not today,” and turned away without another word. The seeker stood silently for a moment. Then, with calm acceptance, he bowed his head and walked away, holding no resentment. He had the wisdom to understand that the man had the right to say no, just as he had the freedom to ask.
It is in moments like these that the real practice begins. Even in our own lives, it is these simple moments that reveal how much we’ve really grown. These experiences serve as tests of our spiritual maturity, revealing how free we truly are within when we release our expectations of how others should behave.
The Sadhu: Beyond Reaction
A sadhu possesses one remarkable quality: they do not react to situations. Whether encountering something pleasant or unpleasant, they remain calm and centered.This doesn't mean they are cold or uncaring —rather, they have learned to maintain peace regardless of circumstances, understanding that reactive emotions only create more inner turbulence.
The sadhu has discovered that external events need not dictate internal states. They respond rather than react, choosing their engagement with life from a place of centered awareness rather than emotional compulsion.
The Paramasadhu: Beyond Thought
There exists an even higher state called Paramasadhu, one who has transcended thinking itself. Most people are controlled by constant mental activity—thinking too much about the past, worrying about the future, and judging the present. A Paramasadhu lives beyond this mental chatter.
This doesn't mean they've lost the ability to think when necessary. Rather, they are no longer controlled by their thoughts. They can choose when to think and when not to, free from the pressure of constant, unwanted thinking.
The Progression of Spiritual Growth
- An ordinary person reacts to everything with emotions and thoughts, pulled by external circumstances.
- A Sadhu has learned not to react, staying calm regardless of what happens around them.
- A Paramasadhu has transcended even thinking itself, living beyond mental chatter.
Necessary Awareness for Daily Living
These teachings are not just abstract ideas— they are wisdom meant to be lived every day. The path of transformation begins with honest self-inquiry: When someone treats us rudely, can we remain calm? When we don't receive what we want, can we accept it peacefully? When our minds fill with worries, can we find the quiet awareness that exists beyond all thoughts?
This application of wisdom transforms ordinary life into a genuine spiritual practice. It begins with manageable steps: not complaining when we must wait longer than expected, not reacting when someone speaks unkindly, and gradually learning to find inner peace regardless of external circumstances.
Transformation of the mind
The goal is to discover the peace and freedom that comes when our emotions and racing thoughts no longer control us. This journey represents the essence of spiritual transformation, evolving from being a victim of circumstances to becoming a master of our inner state, regardless of what life presents.
True freedom isn't found in controlling others or circumstances, but in discovering the unshakeable peace that exists within us, a peace that no external condition can touch.
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